First – A Story
In 2019, when Donald Trump was President, a dear friend and colleague of mine, Bill Dufris, created a huge sign and stuck it on his lawn. In large letters, it asked the question “What Would Jesus Do?” It showed two illustrations. In the first, Trump is walking through water with Jesus following behind him. In the second, Jesus is shown dunking Trump into the water.
A neighbor Bill had not previously met showed up at his door one day; an elderly woman, nervous but resolute, and asked him to take down the sign. He invited her in to talk about it. No one was kinder or friendlier, easier to talk to than my late great friend Bill. But she pursed her lips, shook her head, and marched back down the porch stairs.
So What Happened?
So here’s my question – how might that conversation have taken place? What would Bill have had to do to make it safe enough for her to tell the story behind her demand?
As I was finishing the final chapter in my book, The Listening Coach; Head Heart & Hands Listening in Coach Practice, and just about to ship it off to the publisher – a friend introduced me to Deep canvassing. At first, you may find the term a bit off-putting. You may have associations with the “Deep State”, like Big Brother digging into your political opinions. But that is not the intent of this effort.
What is Deep Canvassing?
Wikipedia offers this definition: Deep Canvassing is a form of political canvassing “that uses long empathic conversations to help shift someone’s beliefs.” And from The Deep Canvass Institute: “Deep canvassing is talking with strangers – about hopes, fears and aspirations. We reach across differences to build connections and trust through conversation.” This is what my book describes as Heart listening – intentionally applied to build bridges across difference. This also strongly aligns with the Positive Intelligence Sage power of Empathy.
Empathy Works
Deep canvassing is a method that promotes candid two-way conversations between canvassers and voters to get them to share the experiences that form their views. This method has proven 102 times more effective in shifting voter choice than the usual political campaign. The foundational premise is that if enough of us truly employ our empathic listening with someone we disagree with, and make them feel truly heard, we will be able to bridge the seemingly intractable chasms that divide our nation.
The act of getting into a deep meaningful conversation with a stranger – one who holds beliefs antithetical to your own – has to start with deep listening. This is not easy. It asks us to set aside our own agenda and actively, intentionally, seek resonance with a stranger in order to build empathy.
The “Yeah but’s”…..
Why is it so difficult for many of us to have deep empathic conversations, especially when it’s very clear how much we need them in our neighborhoods, our workplaces, our interpersonal relationships? I suspect they don’t happen because we fear we will be exhausted by them. But what if, instead, we feel energized and inspired?
Coulda Woulda Shoulda?
In every election cycle over the last eight years, I’ve volunteered to do phone canvassing to help get out the vote. Most of the time, I reach no one as we are all annoyed by these calls, and have ways of blocking them. Deep canvassing, however, holds much richer potential if I can find the time, the focus… the courage.
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